Oscars

 

Once upon a time, I adopted two unwanted fish. They were albino long-finned oscars -- I hadn't previously even known such a thing existed. I knew about oscars...they get big, messy, eat everything... what I didn't know was what awesome fish they actually are.

The thing is, most people buy oscars for one of two reasons. A lot of people who came complaining to me at the fish store would say something like "They were so cute, but then they got big and started eating my other fish!". Sorry, that's kind of what they do -- and before you even start your next question, no, there's not much else you can keep with them. The other reason is actually kind of the opposite... the customer actually was looking for a fish that would eat other fish, because apparently that is cool.

They are cute when little. Like little aquatic puppies, they wiggle their way around the tank and make eyes at you so you'll go feed them. Then you feed them, they grow, and if you actually give them enough space, they make very interesting pets. They'll learn to recognize you as the bringer of food. They'll even sometimes try training you -- mine took to slamming the heater against the glass to get my attention (and food!). I've read other accounts of them splashing people, jumping to hit the tank lid, spitting rocks at the glass... etc.

If you actually want to keep them healthy and happy, though, you need a large tank from the start. 55 gallons will do as a minimum, but the larger you can go the better. They grow fast -- and no, they do NOT "grow to the size of the tank". I hate that particular myth. An oscar can go from 2" to 6" in a matter of weeks, and on to 12" within a year. Just buy a decent tank to begin with. You need a good filter; get one rated for the next tank size up, or two rated for your actual tank size. Lights are not a big deal, since you won't be keeping plants with oscars. Feel free to try, they think they are awesome chew toys. The lighting that comes with most tanks will do fine, and please turn it off at night, fish need sleep too. Get a heater; they like it warm, 78 to 80F.

Feeding is where people go horribly wrong again. They buy them feeder goldfish weekly and then complain that the water is cloudy. Eventually the oscars get sick, although whether it's from the insufficient diet or nasty water is up for debate. What they should be eating is a good quality pellet food (I like Hikari), with frozen food as a treat (krill, beefheart, shrimp). A few goldfish now and then won't kill them, unless you happen to get diseased feeder fish, which is not uncommon, but it shouldn't be their staple diet. I used to end up comparing goldfish to french fries. They are yummy, and your kids will eat them all day long, but if you never make them eat anything else, they'll get sick eventually. I got a lot of funny looks for that one, and the usual objection was that "my fish won't won't eat anything else." Yes, they will. You've spoiled them. Yes, fish can be spoiled. Make them wait a week and watch them gobble down pellets like popcorn. And please, don't brag to me that your oscar likes hot dogs or hamburger meat. It hurts my brain.

My guys ate Hikari pellets with shrimp and krill and the occasional goldfish or crawfish treat -- they were about a foot long each, and they lived to be almost 12 years old. I couldn't afford a tank larger than 55g; I had two filters rated for 55 and 75 running, and did water changes like mad. When one (Gabrielle) lost her eyesight at 11 years old, the other (Michael) protected her and nudged her towards the surface, and I fed her pellets and goldfish by hand. Michael would viciously attack anything that came near his poor blind mate, and when Gabrielle finally died, Michael stopped eating or doing much of anything. He died shortly thereafter.

So no... they are not "just fish." They are awesome fish, if you know what you're doing.